IM Away Messages
Out of my Mind
Out of my mind -- back in 5.
Fell Out of my Chair
I fell out of my chair -- this could take a while.
Cleaning My Room
I am on a quest to the deepest darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor". A long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
Eating
Selecting various food items from our storage for personal consumption.
Cannot Locate Away Message
WARNING: Cannot locate away message, please restart your computer and try back in 365 days.
Cow and "Bull"
I sold my cow...I sold my cow...I have no use for your bull now...
Head Over Heals
Literally head over heals right now. Those stairs get me every time...
Haircut Central
I am currently shaving my animal crackers with a pair of fingernail clippers. Please take a number, and I will cut your hair accordingly. And if you DON'T want the mo-hawk special, please press ¬»ó on your keyboard now.
Trapped
I'm trapped down a well with a giraffe and a pineapple. We'll talk later...
Shrimp Man
Beware when a man dressed as a huge shrimp abandons his post at the opening of a seafood restaurant, steals an experimental hovercraft, and crashes it into your car. Trust me, the insurance company will refuse to pay a cent.
Error #404
Error #404: The user has gone into away mode.
An error has occured in the user's status and they are no longer responding. If you experience this problem often maybe you're talking to the wrong people.
Press any key to continue.
Classified Business
I'm out doing stuff right now. I would tell you what this "stuff" is, but then it wouldn't be a surprise. All I can say is that it doesn't have anything to do with nuclear weapons, and the ferrets are strictly for entertainment purposes. Leeme a message.
Esophagor's Quest
Mutant Graveyard of DOOM! A hideous curse has been placed upon you by the evil and bloated Esophagor. "Fetch me my lunch or you will remain a mutant forever!"roars the Esophagor. Your job is to enter the Mutant Graveyard of Doom and collect enough food to appease the Esophagor. Watch out for the Ghostkerchiefs, walking gravestones, and of course the hideous tentacled eyeball beast. Good Luck, my friend, and Goodbye--as you may not come back alive.
Studying Poem
Now I lay me down to study, I pray the Lord I wont go nutty.
If i should fail to learn this junk, I pray the Lord I will not flunk.
But if i do, don't pity me at all, Just lay my bones in the hall.
Tell my teacher I did my best and pile the books upon my chest.
Now I lay me down to rest, and pray I'll pass tomorrow's test.
If I should die before I wake, that's one less test I'll have to take!
Automated Answering Service
Hello, you have reached the automated answering service for (your_screen_name_here), your message will be answered to in the order in which it was recieved, your message is number 8,243, please hold, your message is important to me.
I've Vanished!
(your_screen_name_here) vanishes into a puff of (name_of_color_here) smoke!!!
Insert 25 Cents
Insert 25 cents and your messege will go through...